On the Road Alone

I had wondered what it would be like to travel for so long on my own. I am not a solitary person; I enjoy making connections and sharing impressions and feelings with others. Yet, I also need time to recharge, to be quiet and not interact with others. So, what would my hosteling experience feel like, always being in spaces with other, often nameless, people?


I’ve had a lot of interactions with people, but many of them are fleeting. You may exchange itineraries very quickly -- where you were last, where you are going next -- and you may identify your nationality and length of travel, but all of that often gets communicated without even exchanging names. 

Occasionally, I’ve make a genuine connection with someone -- like with Jean in Sydney or with David in Melbourne -- and that is what adds the depth to the traveling experience for me. Making a friend on the road lifts that anonymous quality of so many of your interactions: someone sees who you are so you still have a shape and character that isn’t defined by your itinerary. 

You get into a traveler’s trance. You are open enough so that you can share time with others during meals and tours and while bedding down for the night at the hostel, but you already know what you are doing and what you want so you can’t latch onto someone else too deeply. I found this especially true of people my age or older. We have agendas and plans -- perhaps long-held dreams and pent-up aspirations -- and we won’t let other people interfere with them. I see some of the younger travelers mesh up a bit more and combine plans.

One downside to traveling alone is not having pictures of you in these amazing places you are visiting. You end up taking strange-angled, arms-extended poses of your head. Or you rely on someone else to compose a shot of the scene in a pleasing way. Or, my favorites, you take photos in reflective surfaces or use the self-timer. Of course, as soon as you set up the self-timer someone runs in and offers to take your photo, but I usually prefer my own composition.


I think traveling alone has made me assess my options better. I have to make all of the decisions and provide all of the energy for any given plan. I get to veto things I just don’t want to do or just can’t manage to do, and I’m not disappointing anyone else with those choices. As you travel around it’s amazing how many people are willing to tell you what you should do, but when you are alone you can smile and nod and do what you really want to do. 

There are definitely times I have been lonely and wanted to share something with other people. It’s never lasted that long, but it passes through me and I acknowledge it. More often, I just have a heightened understanding that I am alone and that’s a different and less depressing feeling. It reminds me to enjoy what I am doing at that moment. That I only have myself to please, so get to it!

(Sorry about the way this post looks. No matter what I do I can't get it to do what I ask it to.)